Grooms tend to choose their groomsmen for friendship. The best ones turn out to be the friends who are also good at logistics.
In West African weddings, the groom’s party has real work to do, from the traditional ceremony to the end of the reception.
The best man
The best man is the groom’s closest helper. His main duties are:
- Keeping the wedding rings safe until the moment they are needed.
- Making sure the groom is dressed, fed and on time.
- Coordinating the groomsmen and their outfits.
- Often giving a short speech at the reception.
- Helping with money matters on the day, such as paying some vendors if the couple has asked him to.
Before the wedding
The groom’s party may help plan a bachelor’s party, attend fittings and help the groom with tasks such as picking up suits, confirming transport and preparing gifts for the traditional ceremony.
At the traditional ceremony
Groomsmen often carry the items for the bride’s family, arrange seating for the groom’s relatives and help the family spokesman. They should dress in the agreed outfit and behave respectfully in front of elders.
At the church
Groomsmen can act as ushers, showing guests to their seats, handing out programmes and helping elderly guests. They should arrive early, before the guests.
At the reception
Groomsmen help guests find tables, keep an eye on the couple’s needs, make sure the bride and groom get food, and step in if a guest causes trouble. They may lead a dance entrance with the bridesmaids.
Transport and errands
One groomsman should be in charge of the couple’s car and the route between venues. Another can handle last-minute errands, from collecting the cake to buying extra bottled water.
The rehearsal
The groom’s party should attend the church rehearsal, learn where to stand and practise the entrance. Ten minutes of practice saves a lot of confusion when the church is full.
What not to do
Groomsmen should not get drunk before the ceremony, lose the groom’s phone or disappear with the car. The best man’s speech should avoid embarrassing stories about ex-partners.
Choosing the team
Grooms should pick men who will show up, and looking good in photos comes second. The friend who arrives two hours late for everything is still a friend, but perhaps not the one to trust with the rings.
