In Sierra Leone, especially among the Krio of Freetown, a marriage is announced with a ceremony called put stop. The name says it all: the groom’s family comes to “put a stop” to any other suitor by formally claiming the bride. It is a lively, ritual-filled evening, and one of the best-loved parts of a Sierra Leonean wedding.
What put stop means
Put stop is an engagement ceremony. The groom’s family visits the bride’s family home, usually in the evening, to ask for her hand and seal the engagement with gifts. Once it has taken place, the community treats the couple as promised to each other.
The calabash
The centre of the ceremony is a calabash, a decorated gourd, carried by the groom’s family and filled with symbolic items. The contents vary between families, but commonly include kola nuts, money, a ring and other small items that carry meanings about the marriage, such as unity, sweetness and the commitment to stay together. The calabash is presented with speeches and opened before the families.
Spokespeople and the “wrong bride”
As in many West African ceremonies, each family has a spokesperson, and the evening includes playful negotiation. The bride’s family may first bring out other women, sometimes covered, and the groom’s side must say each time that this is not the one they came for. When the real bride appears, the room erupts.
Food and celebration
After the formalities, the families eat together. Sierra Leonean favourites such as jollof rice, cassava leaf stew, groundnut soup and fried plantain are common, along with drinks and music. Matching outfits in African print, often in a colour chosen for the occasion, are popular for both families.
From put stop to the wedding
Put stop may take place weeks or months before the church or mosque wedding. Some Krio families also hold a lively gathering at the bride’s home on the night before the wedding, often called gate night, with music, food and friends dancing late into the evening.
Planning tips
- Ask the bride’s family what should go in the calabash, and who should present it.
- Choose a confident spokesperson who knows Krio customs.
- Coordinate family outfits early with a Freetown tailor.
- For diaspora couples, put stop can be held abroad with relatives, but keep the calabash and the speeches.
Put stop shares its spirit with ceremonies across West Africa, from Ghana’s knocking to the Yoruba introduction. Read more in our guide to bride price customs across Africa.
Put stop: common questions
What is a put stop?
A put stop is the Sierra Leonean engagement ceremony at which the groom’s family formally asks for the bride, signalling that she is no longer available. See Sierra Leone.
What gifts are given at a put stop?
Families commonly bring a calabash or basket with kola nuts, money, a ring and other items agreed with the bride’s family.
Is a put stop a legal marriage?
No. It is an engagement. Couples usually follow it with a civil, church or Islamic wedding.
