The invitation arrives, and so does the question: what should I give?
At weddings in Ghana and Nigeria, gifts range from household items to cash envelopes and notes sprayed on the dance floor. There is no fixed price list, but there are some sensible guidelines.
Start with your relationship
Close family members and very close friends usually give more, and often contribute to the wedding costs themselves. Colleagues, church members and acquaintances can give modest gifts.
If you are in the bridal party, remember that you may already be spending on outfits and events, and couples usually understand that.
Give what you can afford
A wedding gift should not put you in debt. A thoughtful gift within your budget is better than an expensive one you cannot afford. Couples remember that you came and cared more than the amount.
Cash or items?
Many couples prefer cash, because it gives them flexibility. Cash is usually given in an envelope with your name written on it, so the couple can thank you. Some couples share mobile money or bank details for guests who prefer to transfer.
If the couple has a registry, choose from it. If not, useful household items are a safe option.
Spraying
At many receptions, guests spray money on the couple as they dance. In Nigeria, the central bank has warned that spraying naira notes breaks the law, and some guests use other methods, such as placing money in a bowl or using souvenir notes.
Group gifts
Colleagues or friends can pool money to buy a larger gift, such as an appliance, or to give a bigger cash sum together. This is common and appreciated.
If you cannot attend
If you cannot go to the wedding, you can still send a gift or a message. It is thoughtful, especially for close friends and family.
Traditional ceremonies
At traditional marriage ceremonies, gifts from the groom’s family follow the list given by the bride’s family. Guests who are not family are not expected to contribute to those items.
Write a card
A short handwritten note wishing the couple well, tucked into the envelope, is often kept long after the money is spent.
What couples remember
Couples rarely remember exactly how much each guest gave. They do remember who travelled a long way, who helped set up chairs and who sent a kind message. The envelope matters less than people think.
